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Monthly Archives: December 2011

Back pains and sinus infections and allergic reactions.. oh my!

Something I didn't want to consider, but now seems viable.

Driving to, from, and all around Pennsylvania really aggravated my back problems. Issues from my sciatic nerve acting up really began to frustrate me, because the pulsating, stabbing feeling in my right ankle made sleep very difficult. Coincidentally, on this trip I met a man who had the exact same issue as me; herniated disc, sciatic nerve issues, and foot drop. He had just gotten the laproscopic surgery a few weeks before and was having wonderful results, despite the initial hell the week following the procedure. So that was something for me to consider.

Then, while in Pennsylvania, I had to share a bed with my mom. My mom, much like myself, gets sick very easily if she doesn’t get all the sleep she needs. Well, lucky me. I woke up in the middle of the night, and BAM! She coughed in my mouth. A week later, and I’m still feeling the sickness.

This is what I saw in my head when she coughed.

Now the best part. I got a z-pack on Wednesday, which always clears up my sinus infections. Then yesterday, I went about normally though I still felt crappy. I picked up some DayQuil and off I went to do a photo shoot with some friends. Afterwards, I went shopping with my boyfriend. Surprisingly finding quite a few items that I really liked and could afford. Then I woke up this morning, sweating. Get up in a hurry, rushing so I could make it to my chiropractor appointment on time, when I notice somethings off. My arms appear to have a rash… weird.

My ear honestly felt like that. So disturbing.

Out of habit, I touch my ear where my cartilage piercing is and again, something’s off. My left ear is swollen. Wtf. Quickly, I run across the house to show my mom, the whole time thinking of that scene from Hitch when his entire face swells. This would make sense if I was allergic to something, anything. But I’m not. Soon enough, I notice hives on my upper thighs as well. I stress out easily, so my mom tells me if I don’t stay calm it could get worse. Well, I took a Benadryl immediately, showered, and now here I sit. Staying calm. Yet, nothing is going down.

Lesson for the Day: Even when the going gets rough, try to keep your head up.

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Families; Can’t live with them, can’t live without them.

We've all seen Teen Mom. It's not all rainbows and butterflies.

Growing up with young parents has had both it’s ups and downs. One of the major downs was the preconceived notion from all other parents that mine weren’t as smart or well off as them because they had a child at seventeen. Then also, with private Christian schooling, came the judgement of being born out of wedlock. However, I love how close my parents and I have become because they better understand me and my generation due to their age. My best friend’s parents are in their sixties, complete opposite end of the spectrum. Though I adore her mom, she has trouble understanding some aspects of our sense of humor, pop culture, and some things that other generations more easily grasp. While on the other hand, my mom and I have almost the exact same sense of humor and can talk about anything. With my parents being so close in age, I’ve been able to have many experiences that almost none of my friends will. For example, about a month ago, my boyfriend, best friend, and I went and met up with my parents at a club. They even were okay with us partaking in some mood enhancing beverages, if you know what I mean. I never imagined that one day I’d be letting loose at a club for the first time with my mom at my side. It was one of the most fun nights I’ve had in a very long time.

How much turmoil and conflict are you willing to put up with?

Another one of the big downsides is the ups and downs of their own relationship. While I love my boyfriend very much, I know I need to think long and hard about making a life long commitment after watching my parents. They have done the best that they can, but being together for so long and from such a young age (they started dating at fourteen) is a recipe for drama. Sometimes I wonder if when they look back is it really worth it? Well, taking my brother and I out of the equation of course. I just wonder, if it weren’t for my mom getting pregnant, would they have stayed together? Would they have stuck out all the hard times? I could ramble for hours on this topic, but out of respect, I’m choosing not to. I just felt like I needed to write something after the past few days. Why is it so hard to love someone?

Lesson for the Day: Love one another as you love yourself. It’s harder than it sounds.

And couldn’t be busier, yet so far has barely done anything exciting.

I have been so excited to come home to enjoy my wonderous, month-long vacation from school and besides seeing my crazy best friend, the first big thing I did was seeing my therapist. How lame is that? Shortly followed by a long, jam packed Thursday that concluded in a big family dinner with my parent’s pot head friend, her daughter, my pseudo-sister, and my boyfriend.

Now it’s early in the morning on Sunday, so you might wonder how did she spend her Saturday? Oh well, first I worked on a crafty little project that I found on the ever so time consuming invention they like to call Pinterest. Link here. If it works out alright, I’ll add pictures for those who care. Anyways, after adequately covering my hands and legs in gel medium, I wandered downstairs to see what the family was up to. That ended in a three hour discussion about what movie to watch, with my dad complaining about the end result. The important thing is not what we all agreed on, but rather the two things my mom and I watched while waiting for a consensus.

They see me rollin'....

First, we watched 75% of a documentary on the Amish. My mom has always had strange fascinations, including agoraphobia, hippie communes, and now, the Amish way of life. It was more interesting than the monotone voice narrating the documentary would make you believe. I learned a quite a few new things. Not only am I extremely lazy compared to your average Amish girl, but I’m lazy compared to their kids. They had videos of these tiny little kids, probably around five or six, sitting on a horse drawn cart, working on the harvest with the rest of the family. It’s amazing how it really is a family process. Everyone that can help, does. Some people, myself included, would never trade our technologically driven lives for the Amish way but damn, do they have us beat. Work ethic like that is not common in this day and age, at least not in the people I’ve come in contact with. While it might not be your cup of tea, it’s really something to respect.

Not sure I'd be this happy if I had just gotten ice creamed in the face.

Second, and most importantly, we watched clips of my stereotypically favorite movie… The Notebook. Oh goodness, do I love me some Ryan Gosling. Well, as my mom and I were sitting there, drooling over his pure adoration and loyalty, my dad walked in and scoffed. He said that movies like this are the reason women are so unhappy, because Hollywood sells us a lie. Now here’s the problem with that. I can’t let myself believe that a love like that of Alli and Noah doesn’t exist in this world. Yes, Hollywood does sell you a lie when this drool-worthy, sex god also happens to be a total sweetheart. Sorry, girls. But the good guys are the ones who don’t realize how attractive they are. However, I fully believe a deep, passionate, crazy love that that exists somewhere. I’ve even had touches of it myself. Being young and so in love that nothing matters, fighting over the stupidest things and letting kisses shoo all your problems away. I’ve experienced that, and it’s magical. But that’s not the part I envy. I want so badly to grow old with someone, for them to be so devoted that if I lost my memory, that they’d still stay with me. And vice versa. I want a forever with someone. I believe that is not out of reach. Not at all. True love does magical, wonderful things. I believe. So thank you, Nicholas Sparks, for giving me hope.

Lesson for the Day: Be strong like the Amish, but love like a Nicholas Sparks novel.

Everyone deserves this kind of love.

Hmmm....

To go with this whine. HAH. Funny joke, right?! That was just something one of my substitutes would always say. Anywho, I just wanted to complain a tad about the cleanliness of my tiny little room. Various times in the past few days, Judy has made reference to the mess that is her side. Shortly followed by some variance of “I’m not gonna deal with it now”. And then she would usually sit down and start posting on Facebook. Yes, we’re college kids. We like Facebook a lot. Sue me. This began before exam stress set in on her (though she has yet to actually study, instead she’s been watching the Harry Potter Musical, hence the Darren Criss discussion), so she had no excuse not to clean. I, on the other hand, have kept my side orderly, made up notecards and every other study aid I’ll need, anddd did 90% of my packing today. Well anyways, I got fed up and took a few pictures. Since I took that effort, I think maybe you should take a look. Maybe? Please? Validate me? Say that it’s not just me who finds living this way foul and disgusting.

I need someone to talk to. Someone who watches American Horror Story.

Husband vs. Rapist/Daughter's Boyfriend.

I have so much to say, so much of that show is just… it’s just madness. So many connections, murders, and just plain screwed up things going on. Vivian is pregnant with the anti-Christ, Ben fought off the rubber man who is actually Tate (saw that one coming), and now Violet’s dead. All I can say is WTF. Things were finally starting to come around. Ben was seeing things as they really were, aka the maid for the old lady she truly is instead of the young temptress. He finally realized that Viv was raped and not making up the stuff about Hayden. He was gonna get Viv out of the psych ward. He convinced Violet to go back to school. Everything was improving.

I was in shock after I saw this.

But now, since Violet’s dead… well everything’s messed up. How is she gonna tell them? Will she finally admit she sees dead people, and that really they do too? They can’t move now, unless they want to give up their daughter for good. Though that would be kind of evil to leave her to rot with all those psycho dead people, but should they have to suffer through that themselves because Violet made a stupid mistake? How long until the devil baby is born? So many questions. I’m dying for the next episode. It’s all I can think about. Anyone else out there obsessed and need someone to talk to? I’m your girl.

Lesson for the Day: Don’t watch the first ten episodes of a season in a row, leaving yourself anxiously awaiting the last two… for two weeks.

Four exams. Four exams, and three days stand between me and Christmas break.

I. Cannot. Wait.

Whether a monster or serial killer, this fear still lingers.

Christmas break means so many wonderous things. First and foremost, it means I’ll be out of this jail cell sized dorm, to spend a month in a full sized bed. No more of this twin bullshit. No more rolling over and having my leg flip off the edge to where, thanks to American Horror Story, I will always believe there is a creature waiting to pull me under. That could possibly relate to a bizarre dream I had as a child where a grinch-like creature pulled me underneath the couch into their world, forcing me into marriage and never being able to leave… somewhat like Not Without My Daughter, except she chose to marry him… But that’s another story. Christmas also means time with family and friends, tons of food, my great-grandparents cookies, lots of picture taking opportunities, and, of course, presents. Most importantly, it means a much needed break from the oh so wonderful Judy.

Darren Criss... Sexuality Unknown.

The sad part is, these past few days we have been getting along quite nicely. Strange, but nice. My roommate from the first weeks of school had returned. Until a few minutes ago. We had just returned from a Cookout run, had a nice talk about the sexuality of Darren Criss, and then after sufficiently chowing down on some wonderfully greasy food, I logged onto Facebook. There I saw one of my high school friends complaining about how college finals are much harder than high school finals. First of all, duh. Obviously, college is meant to be harder than high school. That’s the whole point, the longer you are in school, the harder it gets. But, as I’ve said before, I’m honestly not that worried about finals. So anyways, I think to myself, “Hey, she might find this amusing too…” Dumbly optimistic, I turn around and tell her what he said, mentioning how I don’t even think finals will be that bad. Her response? “Well… you do have to consider the classes you’re taking.” Andddd, the bitch is back. Lesson learned. Only two more nights with her until I’m back home, so no biggie. Just kinda frustrating to think we’re making progress when actually she’s still gonna be her bitchy self.

Lesson for the Day: As optimistic about a situation as you want to be, don’t forget to be realistic.

With Christmas on the horizon, I am now facing what all college students fear: finals. Or, as the saying goes F.I.N.A.L.S. (f*** I never actually learned shit). All classes are done, and now four exams stand between me and ultimate relaxation. Oddly enough, I’m already pretty much relaxed here.

Maybe I'll be like this later on?

I get on Facebook and find myself barraged with statuses about finals, all nighters, and mass amounts of stress. Not sure why, but I’m not feeling it at all. Maybe it’s because I’ve got enough stress coming from other areas in my life? Maybe it’s because I’ve always been one to cram? Either way, I’m calm and focusing on everything else in the world.

Burn, Sandusky, burn.

For instance, (here comes a shock, I’m talking about real world issues) Sandusky was arrested again on Wednesday. Two new charges have been brought up against him. I honestly don’t understand how a person can be so sick and twisted to take advantage of a child. And then for Paterno and the other higher ups to be aware of it and allow him to continue spending time with young boys. Ugh. The whole thing is just disgusting. It is my strong belief that anyone who molests a child should be castrated, if it’s a woman they have similar things they can do. If you can’t use it right, you deserve to lose it. Forever. This is one of those unforgivable things. I hope he goes to jail. I really truly hope so. Because that’s one thing that even the murderers and various other sick people in jail agree with is wrong. They call people like him “touchers”. In case you didn’t know, “touchers” don’t usually do very well or make it very long in prison. So good luck to you, Sandusky. I hope you get all that you deserve and then some, you sick bastard.

Lesson for the Day: Don’t be a disgusting person. Have morals. And use them.